A year ago yesterday the Mr and I found out we were pregnant... just over a week later we learned that we were going to miscarry. Just thinking about that time brings back such emotions! It was such a roller coaster... actually it was more of a HUGE high and then an even bigger plummit.
I can remember just being completely broken and I cried so hard to God. I just kept telling him "I don't understand". Slowly He brought me back. The Mr. was more than wonderful - even though he was going through it too, I felt like he was holding me up. We prayed and really just gave it to God.
It amazes me now to have such a miracle growing in me exactly one year later. To be entering my third trimester with this child that I prayed so hard for. To look back and see how God took such a horrible event to make me turn that much more to Him.
I remember all of this simply because I don't want to ever forget it. The whole time I was praying for a child I kept saying, I will never take it for granted. I prayed that I will never forget how hard it was to get a baby, so that I never lose sight of how wonderful it is. I told God that I would always pray as hard as I did when I was going through infertility and loss.
One of my favorite verses:
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." ~Philippians 4:6-7