This past weekend was so great! I always love not having anything planned, and it just being me and the Mr. hanging out doing whatever! It was very relaxing! And I made some homemade bread, which was delicious!
So, today I have just been feeling sad. Don't know why. Just sad. I feel like I could just cry. I don't know if it is just on the surface - the weather is gross outside, I should be about to start my period.... or if it is deeper - I am worried I will never get pregnant, I am scared of what the future holds...
The Mr. and I have had talks over the past few months about moving. Niether of us are from Alabama, we don't have family here, we didn't have friends here before we moved. We literally just packed up our stuff and moved. (It's a long story!) But we have come to love this area! I think we have grown together and spiritually here. Long-term though, we really want to live closer to family. Majority of his are in DC, and mine is in North Carolina. With the Mr.'s job, he will probably be able to transfer after the first of the year. This makes me soooo excited!
Anyway, we just don't know what our future holds right now. I know that NO one does, but there are a lot of "if's" in ours. I find that I try so hard to control the situation.
I know that this cycle didn't work. I have to call tomorrow to set up an appointment. I find that I am somewhat "okay" with this. I really feel like God will make us parents! It will just come in His perfect time. I just need to pray for patience. And I need to learn to let go - knowing that God will take care of things!
"Many are the plans in a man's heart but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails." (Proverbs 19:21)
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