Wednesday, September 23, 2009

The Mr.

What can I say about my husband? He is seriously the most wonderful, loving, handsome, perfect guy on earth :) He has been so wonderful through everything - all the doctors appointments, venting, crying, medicines, everything.

The Mr. has been "in" on everything that has gone on. I go to the doctor, and he is the first person I call to tell what happened, what was said, and what the next step is. My last full cycle (in June) he even sat by me when I gave myself the injections. Once I had my follicles and did my trigger shot, he was the first person I shouted to - Tonight's the night!! We have to do it!! (obviously, who else would I shout that too???) When I got the call that I was pregnant, I couldn't even wait to do a big surprise for him, I called him right after I hung up from the nurse. When I got the call that I was going to miscarry, again I called him right after I hung up from the nurse...

After our miscarriage, I had to wait a month before I could make another appointment. During this time, the Mr. and I had a lot of long, deep conversations. Knowing that there wasn't anything we really could have done differently, The Mr. decided that he would rather be in the dark about everything. I think he felt the pressure of me saying "Tonight's the night..." Understandable. So this last cycle (that just ended last week) I kept everything to myself. If it came up, I would tell him things (like why I was leaving the house so early - to go to the doctor).

I also have become more withdrawn in talking with other people. I only had a couple good friends that I would share everything with. Since the miscarriage, I feel more vulnerable, and feel the need to protect (?) myself more... does that even make sense? I let my family know what was going on and our Sunday School class - but I don't let them know the specifics (i.e. drs appointments, medication I'm on, dates of anything...)

I use this blog to vent and also to keep track of where I've been and where I'm going with everything. I am so happy that I am participating in ICLW! I love hearing other's stories and I love knowing that there are others like me out there. I appreciate everyone's comments and am doing my best to make comments on others :) I am okay with not filling in the Mr. with the specifics because I can come here and let it all out! Thanks ladies for sharing such personal information, you never know who will read it, and who it will encourage!

Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. (1 John 4:7)

5 comments:

  1. My Mr. and I have a similar arrangement. I do tell him about dr. appts and what was said but I make a point to not tell him where I'm at in a cycle. It is hard not to have people to talk to IRL about it. I don't want anyone to know what CD I'm at because I don't want anyone waiting expectantly for news. I think you're right, it's a protection thing.

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  2. Thank you for sharing your arrangement and how it helps you with us. It's great when you're able to find a balance that works for you & the Mr. Good luck!!

    ICLW

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  3. I meant to say how it helps you in dealing with IF.

    ICLW

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  4. I am glad for this out let too. Wishing you the best success in your next cycle. - ICLW

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  5. So glad that this space lets you have what you need, while the Mr. gets what he needs.

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